Paddy Ashdown

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A British politician who used to be a fancy spy and had a one-night stand so quick it was like a traffic light on speed.

"Paddy Ashdown? That guy was a spy and had sex before you could say 'cheese sandwich.'"

"He was a spy and a legend. Also, he banged a mistress in like nine seconds. I’m impressed."

"Paddy Ashdown: spy, politician, and the reason why I don’t need a stopwatch for my relationships."

A guy from the UK who was part of a fancy political group and had a fling so fast it could beat a microwave.

"Paddy Ashdown: he was in politics, he was a spy, and he had a fling like it was a race."

"He was a spy and had a mistress. And he did it in under ten seconds. That’s insane."

"Paddy Ashdown: he had a mistress, and it was over before I could finish my coffee."

A British politician who worked for a secret spy group and had a one-night stand so quick it was like a speed bump for love.

"Paddy Ashdown: spy, politician, and he had sex in nine seconds. That’s legendary."

"He was a spy and had a mistress. And it was over before you could say 'milkshake.'"

"Paddy Ashdown: he had a mistress and a spy job. And he did it in under ten seconds. I’m stunned."