Packet Plumber
A senior network engineer. They keep the internet from exploding because they know how to stop packets from clogging up the tubes like a drunk guy in a subway.
I just saved the internet from a meltdown. Thanks to the Packet Plumber, my coffee didn’t spill all over my keyboard.
The Packet Plumber fixed my router before I threw my phone out the window.
Without the Packet Plumber, the internet would be a giant traffic jam. I’d be stuck in it for life.