p-Phone

Fresh

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1
The phone that makes you jump like a startled chicken every time it goes off. It’s like your brain is on a leash and the phone is yanking it.
OMG I JUST DROPPED MY LUNCH BECAUSE MY P-PHONE RANG
I WAS SITTING ON THE LITLE AND MY P-PHONE BLEW UP IN MY FACE
MY P-PHONE RANG DURING MY DREAM AND NOW I’M CONFUSED
2
The reason you’re always late. It buzzes, it rings, it yells. You can’t help but answer it like it’s your ex.
MY P-PHONE WAS BEATING ME UP WITH NOTIFICATIONS AND I HAD TO ANSWER
I WAS IN THE BATH AND MY P-PHONE STARTED YELLING AT ME
MY P-PHONE KNEW I WAS SLEEPING AND RANG ME AT 2 AM
3
That thing you keep in your pocket like it’s your best friend. It makes you do stupid stuff just to see what it has to say.
I TOOK A SHOWER JUST TO SEE WHAT MY P-PHONE HAD TO SAY
MY P-PHONE TAUNTED ME WITH A MESSAGE AND I HAD TO RESPOND
I DROPPED MY KEY AND MY P-PHONE RANG AT THE SAME TIME
4
A device that turns your brain into a pigeon. It just keeps pecking at you with notifications.
I WAS EATING MY SNACK AND MY P-PHONE PECKED ME
MY P-PHONE PECKED ME WHILE I WAS SLEEPING AND I ANSWERED
I HAD TO RUN TO THE BATHROOM JUST TO SEE WHAT MY P-PHONE HAD TO SAY
5
The reason your brain doesn’t work. It goes off like a fire alarm and you have to answer it like it’s a crisis.
MY P-PHONE BLEW A SIREN AND I HAD TO ANSWER IT
I WAS DOING MY HOMEWORK AND MY P-PHONE STARTED A FIRE ALARM
MY P-PHONE RANG AND I THOUGHT MY HOUSE WAS ON FIRE
6
A phone that acts like it’s your boss. It yells at you. It expects you to answer. It doesn’t care if you’re busy.
MY P-PHONE YELLED AT ME AND I HAD TO RESPOND
I WAS SLEEPING AND MY P-PHONE ACTED LIKE IT WAS MY BOSS
MY P-PHONE HAD A MEETING AND I HAD TO ATTEND
xs