Octosophos
Octosophos is a god who’s got an octopus body and a mouth full of nonsense. They don’t tell you the answers, they just drop riddles and laugh at your life choices.
Student: "What’s my future?", Octosophos: "You’ll find out when you’re old and broke."
Teacher: "What’s your dream?", Octosophos: "It’s not good. Probably."
DM: "I need help.", Octosophos: "You’re on your own, kid."