Ocean up
When something goes from bad to absolutely legendary bad, like your pants fell into a volcano
'My life turned into a five-star fur-lined ocean-going balls-up after I got fired and my cat ran away.'
'That party was a five-star fur-lined ocean-going balls-up. I had to eat a shoe.'
'The project was a five-star fur-lined ocean-going balls-up. It was like watching a cat fight a toaster.'