OCDouching

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2 views · Added 7d ago · 3 definitions

1
When you’re so obsessed with cleanliness that you use a douche like it’s your job and your lover’s punishment.
I’ve used a douche three times since we had sex. I’m not even sure why I’m still breathing.
I’d rather get a root canal than let my partner know I didn’t douche after sex.
I’ve turned my shower into a full-time job. It’s called OCDouching now.
2
You’re so anal about being clean that you become a human douchebag and everyone hates you for it.
I douched so much my roommate asked if I was trying to become a fish.
After sex, I douched so hard I almost drowned my pet goldfish.
I used a douche so much, my therapist thinks I’m trying to escape my life.
3
You’re so obsessed with being clean that you turn into a walking douche and make everyone else want to scream.
I douched so much my dog started to question my life choices.
I used a douche after every single sexual encounter. I had a schedule for it.
I douched so much, my ex said I should’ve been a plumber.
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