Oblique Fire

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Oblique fire is when someone or something is so bad it feels like they’re trying to ruin your day just for fun.

My cousin got oblique fire after he ate five tacos and still tried to beat me at chess.

That movie was oblique fire. I fell asleep halfway through and didn’t even care.

My dog got oblique fire when he tried to eat my homework and then pooped on my shoes.

Oblique fire is like being yelled at by a ghost who also has a grudge against you.

My math teacher gave me oblique fire when I drew a mustache on the blackboard.

That game was oblique fire. I lost three times in a row and my friend laughed at me.

My brother got oblique fire when he tried to steal my pizza and got stuck in the fridge.

Oblique fire is when something or someone is so bad it makes you want to cry, throw things, and maybe even call your mom.

That cereal was oblique fire. I ate it for a week and still didn’t like it.

My friend got oblique fire when he tried to do a magic trick and it backfired.

My mom gave me oblique fire when she yelled at me for eating the last slice of cake.

Oblique fire is when you’re so annoyed you could punch a wall and still feel like it wasn’t enough.

That song was oblique fire. I turned it off and still felt like I needed a nap.

My sister got oblique fire when she tried to make a sandwich and forgot the bread.

My dog got oblique fire when he tried to chew my homework and then pooped on my shoes again.

Oblique fire is when you’re so bad at something it feels like the whole world is against you.

My friend got oblique fire when he tried to sing and it was like hearing a cat scream.

That video game was oblique fire. I lost ten times and still didn’t get it.

My brother got oblique fire when he tried to do a magic trick and it exploded.