obijohnshinobi

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A grumpy old relic who thinks they're still cool and still has a pulse.

My uncle is an obijohnshinobi. He still wears his 80s hair and yells at me for using TikTok.

My obijohnshinobi boss won't let me take lunch breaks. He says I'm wasting time.

My obijohnshinobi neighbor keeps yelling at the mailman like it's the 1980s.

A guy who’s so good looking and so cool that he makes everyone else look like they just fell out of a dumpster.

My obijohnshinobi coworker got promoted because he can smile and make coffee at the same time.

My obijohnshinobi crush has a dog, a car, and a degree. And he still makes me blush.

My obijohnshinobi friend dated my mom. And he was still better looking.

So old you might as well be a fossil, and everyone knows it.

My obijohnshinobi grandpa still uses a flip phone and thinks the internet is a conspiracy.

My obijohnshinobi teacher keeps telling us about the 90s like it was yesterday.

My obijohnshinobi aunt still wears her 80s leg warmers and talks about the “good old days” like they were real.