Obalong
Obalong is when something is so long and lumpy, it looks like it was made by a drunk pig. Obalongas are girls who take up half the sidewalk and still complain about the traffic.
That woman’s skirt is obalong. It looks like a tent for a whole army.
My neighbor’s dog is obalong. It waddles like it’s got 10 pounds of confetti in its butt.
My brother’s beard is obalong. It’s like a jungle grew on his face.