OBA

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A smelly, ugly Asian girl who cries like a baby and wheezes like a dying goat when you get too close. She’s the worst.

My cousin’s OBA cousin cried during the movie and snorted soda all over me.

That OBA girl at the mall screamed so loud I got a headache.

My mom said my OBA aunt smells like old socks and regret.

An Asian girl who just landed in America and thinks she’s the queen. She’s still trying to figure out how to use a toilet.

My OBA cousin tried to flirt with my dad and said, ‘You’re the best man I’ve ever seen!’ He asked her if she knew what a man was.

That OBA girl at the grocery store tried to speak English and said, ‘I like chicken and dog.’

My OBA aunt brought a whole chicken to my house for dinner and said it was ‘traditional.’

A guy who says ‘Netflix and chill’ and then tries to put his tongue down your throat. He’s a total creep.

My friend’s OBA said, ‘Netflix and chill,’ and then tried to kiss me in front of my mom.

That OBA guy at the party said, ‘We can just watch movies,’ and then tried to touch my leg.

My OBA brother said, ‘Netflix and chill,’ and then my sister had to pull him off me.

The most attractive man alive. Girls faint every time he looks at them. He’s like a superhero.

My OBA crush walked in the room and my friend fainted. I was like, ‘Why are you screaming?’

That OBA guy at the gym looked at me and I got a brain freeze.

My OBA brother said, ‘That guy is so hot, I’m gonna die.’

A Nigerian guy who acts like he’s tough, but he’s scared of everything. Dogs scare him. That’s a problem.

My OBA uncle screamed when a dog barked at him. I laughed so hard I cried.

That OBA guy at the park ran away when a dog chased him. He looked like a baby.

My OBA cousin said, ‘I’m not afraid of anything,’ and then a dog barked and he cried.

A person who talks nonsense and acts like they know everything. They’re confusing and annoying.

My OBA friend said, ‘I can speak five languages,’ and then said ‘goodbye’ in chicken.

That OBA guy at the bus stop said, ‘I’m a master of everything,’ and then got lost.

My OBA cousin said, ‘I’m the smartest person ever,’ and then asked me how to use a phone.

The strongest guy in the world. He doesn’t let anyone mess with him. He’s a total badman.

My OBA brother beat up my friend for no reason. He’s like a superhero.

That OBA guy at the gym lifted a car like it was nothing. I was impressed.

My OBA cousin said, ‘No one messes with me,’ and then he kicked my friend’s butt.