oatmeal muncher

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A smelly hippie who probably eats oatmeal for breakfast and smells like a moldy tent in a ditch.

That oatmeal muncher tried to hug me and smelled like he slept in a compost pile.

I saw the oatmeal muncher at the park eating a bowl of oatmeal with a banana that looked like it was stolen from a raccoon.

My cousin’s roommate is an oatmeal muncher, and he won’t stop talking about how he ‘communes with nature’ every morning.

A person who lives in a tent, eats oatmeal, and probably thinks you’re a ‘soul-stealing capitalist’ for using a toothbrush.

The oatmeal muncher at the coffee shop called my latte a ‘soul-stealing drink’ and tried to trade me a banana for it.

My neighbor is an oatmeal muncher who thinks I’m a ‘soul-stealing capitalist’ because I own a phone.

I met an oatmeal muncher who tried to convince me that capitalism was a ‘soul-stealing curse’ from the devil.

A dirty, bearded man who probably hasn’t showered since the moon landed and eats oatmeal like it’s a sacred ritual.

The oatmeal muncher at the bus stop ate his oatmeal with a spoon and a banana while wearing a shirt that looked like it was from the 70s.

My uncle is an oatmeal muncher who thinks eating oatmeal is a ‘sacred ritual’ and has a beard that looks like a raccoon’s nest.

I saw an oatmeal muncher eating his oatmeal in the park, and he had a beard so long it looked like it was trying to escape.