oarientation

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The first time you get tossed into a boat and told to row like your life depends on it, even though it clearly doesn’t.

My orientation was a 30-minute row with no instructions. I thought I was in a race, not a nightmare.

The teacher yelled at me for holding the oar like it was a sword. It wasn’t a duel, Karen.

I nearly capsized during orientation. I blame the guy who kept laughing at my struggle.

That awkward first day when you’re stuck in a boat with people who think they’re the best rowers, but they’re clearly not.

My orientation was like being stuck in a boat with a bunch of middle schoolers who think they’re Navy SEALs.

I sat next to a guy who kept shouting 'Row like you’re fighting a dragon!' during orientation. I’m still not sure why.

The orientation was so bad, I almost rowed the boat back to the dock.

The moment you realize that the boat isn’t going anywhere, and neither are you, but you’re still expected to look like you know what you’re doing.

During orientation, I looked like I knew what I was doing. I didn’t. I just had a lot of pride.

The boat didn’t move during orientation. I still tried to look cool. That’s how I got called 'the fake rower.'

I faked my way through orientation. It worked… until the teacher saw me breathing.

The first time you’re forced to row with a group of people who clearly have no idea what they’re doing, and neither do you.

My orientation was a group of kids who thought rowing was just 'flailing arms in water.'

I sat next to a guy who rowed backwards during orientation. I don’t know why he was there.

The group during orientation was so bad, I thought the lake was going to drown us all.

A chaotic introduction to rowing that feels more like a prison break than a sport.

My orientation felt like a prison break. I had no idea what I was doing, but I was ready to escape.

The teacher screamed at us during orientation. It felt like a prison break, but with more yelling.

During orientation, the boat almost broke. It was like a prison break, but with water.