nALOEgene
You smash an aloe plant like it owes you money, then pour the goo into your Nalgene like it's the last drop of water on Earth. You let it sit until your sunburn feels like it's getting a divorce.
I poured aloe into my Nalgene and let it sit for three hours. My sunburn is now plotting revenge.
My Nalgene is now a shrine to my sunburn’s suffering.
I took a sip of my aloe Nalgene and cried. It was that good.