Naired

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So wasted you can’t walk and someone has to drag you to the ER like you’re a f***ing drunk slug.

I naired so hard I missed my own birthday party and woke up in a hospital with a nurse feeding me soup.

He naired at the bar and ended up in the ER with a broken nose and a hangover that could kill a horse.

She naired so much she forgot her kid’s name and cried on the school bus.

A hot mom who’s got it all together but still lets you fail because she thinks you’re cool.

My mom is a Nair. She got straight A’s in college but still lets me skip school because she thinks I’m ‘rebellious.’

That Nair down the street is so good she married her high school crush and still takes care of her three kids and her dog.

She’s a Nair. She works full-time, cooks for her family, and still texts me every day to check if I did my homework.

A hair-removing lie that makes you look like a f***ing idiot with no hair.

I used that Nair and my legs looked like they were burned by a f***ing dragon.

My face was so smooth after Nair I looked like a baby and my ex said I was ‘disgusting.’

That Nair didn’t work, it just made me look like I had been attacked by a beaver.

A f***ing move in a video game that you do mid-air like you’re trying to kill your opponent with your feet.

I used a Nair in Smash Bros and almost beat my brother. He was so mad he screamed like a f***ing parrot.

That Nair move looked cool, but it didn’t do anything and I got killed by a f***ing pikachu.

I did a Nair and it looked like I was dancing, but I still lost the game.

A f***ing burn that turns your skin red and feels like your legs are on fire and your fingers are melting.

I used that Nair and my legs were on fire. I looked like a f***ing tomato and my fingers were melting.

My skin was red and burning like I had a f***ing sun in my legs after that Nair.

That Nair was so strong it burned my face and I looked like I had been attacked by a dragon.

A f***ing ‘no’ that you say when you’re too lazy to make a full sentence.

‘Nair’ is what I said when my mom asked me to clean my room and I was too lazy to even say ‘no.’

He said ‘Nair’ when I asked him to help me move and he just rolled his eyes like a f***ing grumpy old man.

‘Nair’ is what you say when your teacher asks you a question and you’re too dumb to answer.

Zero, nothing, and the reason you failed math because you thought it was ‘no’ and not ‘none.’

I got a zero on my test and my teacher said it was ‘Nair’ and I was like ‘what even is that?’

He said there were ‘Nair’ people in the room and I was like ‘what’s that mean?’

That Nair was so confusing I thought it was a new language and I asked my mom if it was Spanish.