n00bium

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The toxic metal inside every n00b. Too much of it makes you scream at your TV like it owes you money.

'I got n00bium from my brother. Now I can't beat him at Fortnite.'

'My cousin drinks n00bium for breakfast. He's 12 and still loses to my dog.'

'I found n00bium in my cereal. Now my life is ruined.'

A cursed element that makes n00bs think they're cool. It's why they still use the word 'noob' like it's a superpower.

'My friend got n00bium from a meme. Now he thinks he's a legend.'

'I tried to beat my sister at a game. She had n00bium. I lost.'

'My teacher said n00bium is the reason kids fail math.'

A magical poison found in n00bs. It makes them yell at their screens and throw their controllers like they’re in a rage.

'My brother got n00bium from a video game. Now he screams at the internet.'

'I got n00bium from my friend. I now hate my life.'

'My mom said I had too much n00bium. I asked why. She said, 'Because you lost to a turtle.'