Madden Envy

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2 views · Added 8d ago · 7 definitions

Madden envy is when a woman, usually your wife, girlfriend, or mom, hates Madden for no damn reason and acts like it’s a personal attack. She’ll nag you nonstop until you feel like a loser.

'I swear if you don’t stop playing Madden, I’ll leave you for a guy who doesn’t play video games.'

'You play Madden instead of me? I’m gonna die of embarrassment.'

'If you don’t quit Madden, I’ll eat your Xbox.'

by Slangipedia 8d ago

She walks by your room, hears ‘EA Sports, It’s In The Game,’ and turns around like she’s been personally insulted. She gives you the stare of doom like you just said something stupid.

'I heard EA Sports and I’m not going to let you live.'

'You said EA Sports? I’m coming for you.'

'You just triggered me.'

by Slangipedia 8d ago

She yells ‘OH MY GOD!’ like it’s the end of the world. It’s just because you said EA Sports and she’s too dramatic to handle it.

'OH MY GOD! You said EA Sports? I’m going to cry!'

'OH MY GOD! I’m going to leave you for good!'

'OH MY GOD! I’m going to die of Madden envy!'

by Slangipedia 8d ago

She tries to seduce you or distract you with sex, but you’re too focused on Madden. You ignore her, and she gets even angrier.

'You’re too busy playing Madden to notice me? I’m going to get revenge.'

'You’d rather play Madden than have sex with me? I hate you.'

'You’re ignoring me for Madden? I’m going to scream.'

by Slangipedia 8d ago

She sits in the room and cheers for the other player. She pisses you off so much you lose to a scrub who can’t even play straight.

'She’s cheering for the other guy? I’m going to beat her up.'

'She’s rooting for the other player? I’m going to lose this game.'

'She’s against me? I’m going to lose to a scrub.'

by Slangipedia 8d ago

She calls her friends over and they all sit in the room and try to talk you out of playing. They gang up on you like you’re a criminal.

'My friends are coming over to stop you from playing Madden.'

'They’re all here to talk you out of playing.'

'My friends are going to help me beat you.'

by Slangipedia 8d ago

She makes up some dumb task for you to do, like cleaning the house or doing laundry. She doesn’t even care if you do it.

'I want you to clean the house, or I’m going to scream.'

'I want you to do the laundry, or I’m going to cry.'

'I want you to mop the floor, or I’m going to die.'

by Slangipedia 8d ago