Mad Knowledge

My boss sent me a fax about my lunch break. I got it at 10 am. I was still eating.

Fax machine broke. I had to print the letter and mail it to the guy who sent it. He cried.

Fax said 'U R A DOOFUS' in all caps. I got a $500 fine for being a doofus.

Got a fax from my grandpa. It said 'U R A DOOFUS' in cursive. I didn’t know he knew cursive.

Fax from my mom said 'DON'T FORGET TO EAT' and it had a drawing of a sandwich. I ate a sandwich for dinner.

Fax from my dad said 'I'M STILL ALIVE' and it had a drawing of a dead man. I laughed for an hour.

Fax from my coworker said 'YOU ARE A DOOFUS' with a scribble in the middle. It looked like a kid drew it with crayon.

My boss sent a fax with a big smudge. He said he was crying when he wrote it.

Fax from my friend said 'HELLO' and it had a drawing of a cat. I asked why there was a cat. He said 'because I was tired.'

Fax from my neighbor said 'DON'T FORGET TO WATER THE LAWNS' and it had a drawing of a watering can. I watered the lawn. It didn’t help.

My friend sent a fax with a doodle of a pizza. I asked why there was a pizza. He said, 'because I was hungry.'

Fax from my mom said 'I LOVE YOU' and it had a drawing of a heart. I cried. It was the first time she said that.

Fax from my dad said 'I WATCH CAT VIDEOS ALL DAY' and it had a drawing of a cat. I asked why he sent it. He said, 'because I thought you would get a laugh.'

My mom sent a fax with a cat drawing and said 'I LIKE CATS.' I said, 'I like you.'

Fax from my neighbor said 'CAT VIDEOS ARE BETTER THAN YOU' and it had a drawing of a cat eating a pizza. I got a $500 fine for being a doofus.

Fax from my dad smelled like old paper and regret. It said 'I’M STILL ALIVE' and it had a drawing of a dead man.

My mom sent a fax that smelled like old paper and regret. It said 'I LOVE YOU' and it had a drawing of a heart.

Fax from my neighbor smelled like old paper and regret. It said 'DON'T FORGET TO WATER THE LAWNS' and it had a drawing of a watering can.