Macho Picchu

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1
A tiny Peruvian town where men think they’re gods and act like they’ve never been defeated by a woman or a bad cup of coffee.
My cousin moved to Macho Picchu because he thought it was a place where men never cried.
The guy at the bar said he came from Macho Picchu because he ‘didn’t want to be outshone by a chicken.’
My uncle claims he’s from Macho Picchu because he once yelled at a mountain.
2
A place where men flex so much they might as well be doing yoga with their biceps.
My friend’s dad says he’s from Macho Picchu because he once bench-pressed a goat.
The guy at the gym said he’s from Macho Picchu because he’s ‘too manly to use a towel.’
My cousin’s neighbor says he’s from Macho Picchu because he once fought a chicken in public.
3
A town so full of men who think they're tough that even the cows are scared of them.
My uncle says he’s from Macho Picchu because he once yelled at a cow until it ran away.
The guy at the bus stop said he moved there because he ‘didn’t want to be called soft.’
My friend’s brother says he’s from Macho Picchu because he once tried to wrestle a goat and lost.
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