Mac owner

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A brainless moron who farts rainbows every time he lays eyes on an Apple product. He’d hug Steve Jobs’ corpse if it had a plug for charging.

I just got a new MacBook and it’s the best thing since sliced bread... and also the only thing I’ve ever liked.

I’d die for Apple. I’d die for Steve Jobs. I’d die for a free iPhone. I’d die for a free iPhone and a free MacBook.

My Mac is like my baby. I don’t even know why I bought it. It just looked cool.

A meat sack who cries like a baby whenever Apple releases a new gadget. He’s got Steve Jobs’ ghost as his personal hype man.

I got a new iPhone and now I’m rich. I just need a new MacBook to be even richer.

I don’t use my Mac. I just stare at it and cry happy tears.

My Mac is so shiny I can see my face in it. And I don’t even like my face.

A loser who thinks he’s the king of the world just because he owns a Mac. He probably still uses Windows under his bed.

I use my Mac for everything. Even my cat’s schedule. And my mom’s grocery list.

I wouldn’t touch a Windows computer if it was on fire. And I wouldn’t touch it if it was on fire and my mom was in it.

I have 10 Macs. I don’t need them all. I just like looking rich.