Lactosesexual

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When you get hard just looking at cheese and yogurt. It’s like your pants are on fire and the fire is made of cream.

I saw a yogurt carton and I had to leave the store before I embarrassed myself.

My friend got a milk mustache and now he’s the talk of the school.

I can’t go to the grocery store without getting a boner from the ice cream aisle.

You’re so into milk you’d rather date a cow than your ex.

I asked my crush out, and he said he’d rather date a cow than me.

My mom says I’m lactosesexual because I’ve been staring at the fridge for two hours.

I skipped class to go to the dairy aisle. My teacher called me a ‘moo-ment’.

You’re so obsessed with dairy you’d rather have a cheeseburger than a girlfriend.

My crush asked me to prom, and I said I’d rather go with a cheeseburger.

I ate a whole gallon of ice cream and now I’m the talk of the school.

I got a job at the dairy store just to be closer to my favorite milk.

You’re like a cow who can’t stop thinking about grass. Except the grass is milk.

I was in math class and I started thinking about yogurt. My teacher got mad.

I tried to ask my crush out, but I got distracted by a milk carton.

I had to leave the room because I got a boner from a sour cream ad.

You get turned on by milk so much you’d rather have a cheese addiction than a girlfriend.

I told my crush I’d rather have a cheese addiction than date him.

I got a tattoo of a milk carton and now I’m the talk of the town.

I skipped dinner to eat a whole loaf of bread with butter.

You're so into milk you'd rather have a butter meltdown than a breakup.

My ex broke up with me, but I’m still happy because I got a butter meltdown.

I had to leave my job because I was too distracted by the yogurt aisle.

I got a new nickname at school: ‘the milk man’.