labsicle
A dead pet that gets frozen so the owner can keep it forever, like a smelly, frozen trophy. Some vets will let you keep it for cash, like a greedy ice cream truck driver.
My dog’s a labsicle now. I pay $50 a month to keep it from melting in my garage.
I’d rather have a frozen lab than a ex who won’t stop texting me.
My dad’s labsicle is so old, it’s got more hair than my uncle.