Kafkalias

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1
A last name that sometimes shows up as a first name. Kafkalias is known for their twisted sense of humor and love for making everything sound like a joke. You never trust their answers, because they’re always lying through their teeth.
"Why did the chicken cross the road?" Kafkalias said, "To prove that chickens don't care about logic." I still don't know if that's true.
I asked Kafkalias if the sky was blue. They said, "No, it's the color of my soul." I'm still confused.
Kafkalias told me the world was ending. I asked, "When?" They said, "When you stop caring." I stopped caring two days later.
2
A last name that usually comes with a first name like Andreas. Kafkalias is all about being sarcastic and making you question your life. Their answers are like riddles wrapped in insults.
I asked Kafkalias if I was fat. They said, "No, you're just normal." I still feel fat.
Kafkalias said I was going to fail. I asked, "Why?" They said, "Because you're not trying." I tried harder. I still failed.
Kafkalias told me to shut up. I asked why. They said, "Because your voice is louder than your brain." I've been quiet ever since.
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