J.Owen

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When you stare at your meat like it’s the last burger on the grill and you’re hungry and tired and it’s 2 a. m.

My mom thinks I’m studying. I’m actually J. Owen-ing in my room.

I tried to do homework. Now I’m just J. Owen-ing on my phone.

I told my friend I was going to bed. I’m actually J. Owen-ing in the closet.

You get so hard you think you’re gonna explode. And you don’t care who sees you.

I J. Owen-ed in the hallway and my teacher walked in. I didn’t care.

I J. Owen-ed in the bathroom and my brother came in. He didn’t care.

I J. Owen-ed in the car and my dad saw. He didn’t care.

You imagine your meat is a cheeseburger and you’re eating it. You’re not even hungry.

I J. Owen-ed and imagined my meat was a cheeseburger. I wasn’t even hungry.

I J. Owen-ed in the middle of class. I was imagining a cheeseburger.

I J. Owen-ed during lunch. I was eating a cheeseburger in my head.

You’re so busy J. Owen-ing you forget to breathe. You’re not even tired.

I J. Owen-ed so hard I forgot to breathe. I was not even tired.

I J. Owen-ed and my face turned red. I was not even tired.

I J. Owen-ed in my sleep. I was not even tired.

You’re so focused on your meat you think it’s the only thing that matters in life.

I J. Owen-ed and forgot about my math test. My meat was the only thing that mattered.

I J. Owen-ed and my friend asked me a question. I didn’t answer.

I J. Owen-ed and my mom called me. I didn’t answer.

You’re J. Owen-ing so much your pants are getting wet. You don’t care.

I J. Owen-ed so much my pants got wet. I didn’t care.

I J. Owen-ed in my shorts. My shorts got wet. I didn’t care.

I J. Owen-ed and my friend laughed. I didn’t care.