jackmaballsack

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a big butt guy named jack who cries like a baby when his pizza gets cold

Jack: 'MY PIZZA IS HALF-COLD AND I'M DYING!'

Jack texted me: 'I can't handle this anymore. I'm going to cry in my soup.'

At the mall, Jack started sobbing because the escalator moved too fast.

jack is a giant man who thinks he's the main character of his own sad story

Jack: 'I'm the hero. You're just the sidekick. You don't even have a name.'

Jack posted: 'No one understands my pain. I'm stuck in this sad life.'

Jack yelled at the grocery store clerk: 'You're not even worthy of my presence!'

jack is a man so fat and emotional he could burst from crying and eating

Jack: 'I ate three pizzas and cried for an hour. I'm going to explode.'

Jack sent a DM: 'I'm 90% full and 100% sad. I'm dying.'

Jack fell over at the gym because he cried too much after his workout.

jack is a guy who yells about everything and thinks he's the king of the world

Jack: 'I'm the king of the world! You're just a peasant!'

Jack yelled at the traffic light: 'You're not even giving me a break!'

Jack screamed in the park: 'I'm the best at everything! You're all losers!'

jack is a man who cries, eats, and yells at everything like it's a personal attack

Jack: 'You're attacking my feelings and my pizza! I'm going to cry and eat!'

Jack texted: 'This is a personal attack. I'm going to cry and eat my feelings.'

Jack yelled at the sky: 'You're not even giving me a break! I'm going to eat and cry!'