Jackiee
She’s got the looks, the attitude, and the love for bacon. She’ll help you out if you’re nice. If you’re not, she’ll call you out in the worst way possible.
You: "I’m so tired." Jackiee: "Cool. I’m now twice as tired."
She texts you: "Bacon is my only religion. You’re not getting my help unless you bring me bacon."
She showed up to your breakdown and just said, "You’re not broken. You’re just being a pain in the ass."