JACK_OUFF
A man who thinks he's the main character of his own soap opera, and everyone else is just there to suffer.
'I can't believe you left me at the party! I was the star of the show!', Jake, to his friend
'You didn't even like my new haircut! I'm ruined.', Jake, at the barber shop
'I'm going to write a book about this.', Jake, 10 minutes after the incident