Jack Swan
A Sid from Toy Story who looks like he tried to be cool but ended up looking like a lost sock. He’s not the brightest bulb in the bulb factory, but he’s the one who’ll bring you coffee when you’re hungover.
Jack Swan is like a broken fan that still spins, but it’s annoying.
He’s the reason I don’t have a death wish.
He’s the human version of a half-eaten pizza.