Jack Shepherd
Jack Shepherd is the man behind Baldmary Oil. He’s also BonzoTheGreat. He’s got a bald spot so big, it’s like a hole in the ground. People think he should be on Love Island, but he got replaced by some guy called Radick Milner.
Jack Shepherd’s bald spot is so big, it could swallow a car.
Why isn’t Jack Shepherd on Love Island? He’s got a bald spot bigger than the ocean.
Radick Milner got the Love Island spot. Jack Shepherd got the bald spot. Life’s not fair.