Jaap Stam

My cousin tried to fight Jaap Stam and got sent to the hospital with a broken nose and a ego the size of a dump truck.

That guy tried to beat up Jaap Stam and ended up crying like a baby in the middle of a football field.

Jaap Stam walks into a bar and the barista says 'We don't serve bald gladiators here.' He says 'I'm not a gladiator, I'm a brick-shit-house.'

Jaap Stam walked into a gym and challenged the strongest man in the room. The strongest man asked, 'What's your name?' Jaap said, 'Jaap Stam.' The strongest man said, 'I don't know you.' Jaap said, 'You will.'

Jaap Stam took on a group of bullies and ended up getting a tattoo of a brick on his forehead for being so tough.

Jaap Stam tried to beat up a math teacher and got a detention and a punch in the face.

Jaap Stam walked into a classroom and said, 'I'm the king of the block.' The teacher said, 'You're not even a student here.' Jaap said, 'I will be.'

Jaap Stam tried to fight a principal and got suspended for throwing a brick through the window.

Jaap Stam went to a pizza place and ordered 100 pizzas because he thought he was the king of the block. The pizza place said, 'We only have 10 pizzas left.' Jaap said, 'I will eat them all.'