I'll get up with you

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I'll let you sleep like a baby while I curse the day you were born.

I'll get up with you tomorrow, but only if you promise to never wake me up again.

I'll get up with you, but I'll be the one yelling at the traffic.

I'll get up with you, but I'll be the one who smells like old pizza.

I'll rise with you, but only after I throw a shoe at your head.

I'll get up with you, but I'll be the one who trips over the dog.

I'll get up with you, but I'll be the one who yells at the alarm clock.

I'll get up with you, but I'll be the one who still smells like last night's regret.

I'll join you in the struggle, but I won't be the one who cries about it.

I'll get up with you, but I'll be the one who eats the whole bag of chips.

I'll get up with you, but I'll be the one who still has a life.

I'll get up with you, but I'll be the one who laughs at your bad hair.