I'd Love To Turn You On - It's when someone tries to sound poetic but just sounds like

It's when someone tries to sound poetic but just sounds like they're trying too hard to be cool.

'I'd love to turn you on, but you're too cool for this nonsense.'

'I'd turn you on if you didn't already have a life.'

'I'd love to turn you on, but I'm still trying to figure out my own life.'