i wouldn't take a shit there - A place so terrible that if you took a shit there, you’d be

A place so terrible that if you took a shit there, you’d be doing it a favor.

I wouldn’t take a shit there. That spot is like a cursed toilet from a horror movie.

I wouldn’t take a shit there. It looks like someone tried to make a mess and failed at it.

I wouldn’t take a shit there. That place is so bad, it could make a saint swear.