i wouldnt kick her out of bed if she farted

My cousin’s girlfriend is the kind of girl I wouldn’t kick out of bed even if she farted and set the whole house on fire.

This toaster is the kind of thing I wouldn’t kick out of bed if it farted and burned my toast.

My mom’s old jeans are the kind of pants I wouldn’t kick out of bed if they farted and smelled like old socks.

My neighbor’s daughter is the kind of girl I wouldn’t kick out of bed if she farted and turned into a giant monster.

This pencil is the kind of tool I wouldn’t kick out of bed if it farted and drew on my face.

My dog is the kind of pet I wouldn’t kick out of bed if he farted and ate my shoes.

My brother’s crush is the kind of girl I wouldn’t kick out of bed if she farted and knocked out the whole block.

This spoon is the kind of utensil I wouldn’t kick out of bed if it farted and spilled my soup.

My old phone is the kind of device I wouldn’t kick out of bed if it farted and crashed my game.

My teacher’s niece is the kind of girl I wouldn’t kick out of bed if she farted and turned my classroom into a stink bomb.

This sock is the kind of thing I wouldn’t kick out of bed if it farted and smelled like a garbage can.

My uncle’s old car is the kind of ride I wouldn’t kick out of bed if it farted and smoked like a dragon.

My friend’s sister is the kind of girl I wouldn’t kick out of bed if she farted and made my whole neighborhood cry from the stench.

This pencil sharpener is the kind of thing I wouldn’t kick out of bed if it farted and cut my fingers off.

My grandma’s cake is the kind of dessert I wouldn’t kick out of bed if it farted and exploded in my mouth.