I would, but I'm pregnant

a lie women tell to get out of doing stuff, like running or eating a burger, because they say their baby will eat them if they don't

a magical excuse that makes everything else seem like a tough workout, used when someone is too fat to move

a superpower that lets women pretend they can't do anything, even though they can still fit into a pair of jeans

a made-up condition that lets women sit still while everyone else is doing stuff, even if they just had a baby six months ago

a fake disease that only happens to women, used to get out of doing stuff like running or eating a burger

a made-up excuse that lets women say they can’t do anything, even if they just had a baby and can still walk a mile