i won't be long

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1 views · Added 2d ago · 5 definitions

1
I’ll be back before you finish your snack and realize you hate your life
I won’t be long. (He left. The snack is now a shrine.)
I won’t be long. (He came back 2 hours later, wearing a shirt from 2013.)
I won’t be long. (He came back with a burger and a side of regret.)
2
I’ll be back before your coffee goes cold and your patience turns to ash
I won’t be long. (He left. The coffee is now a black hole.)
I won’t be long. (He came back with a latte and a side of insults.)
I won’t be long. (He came back 45 minutes later, with a side of sarcasm.)
3
I’ll be back before your pizza gets cold and your hope dies a slow death
I won’t be long. (He left. The pizza is now a monument.)
I won’t be long. (He came back with a side of regret and a half-eaten slice.)
I won’t be long. (He came back 2 hours later, still eating the pizza.)
4
I’ll be back before your brain forgets your name and your life gets worse
I won’t be long. (He left. Your brain now thinks your name is ‘Bob.’)
I won’t be long. (He came back 3 hours later, and your brain is still confused.)
I won’t be long. (He left. Your life now has a side of chaos.)
5
I’ll be back before your mom calls and your dad yells at you
I won’t be long. (He left. Your mom called in 10 minutes.)
I won’t be long. (He came back 2 hours later, and your dad is now yelling at both of you.)
I won’t be long. (He left. Your mom called. Your dad yelled. You are now dead inside.)
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