I went to the ocean once

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A fancy way of saying I got kicked out of a boat for being too stupid.

I went to the ocean once. The boat was like a fancy car. I was like a dumb kid who didn't know how to ride a bike.

I went to the ocean once. The captain said I was worse than a broken toaster.

I went to the ocean once. I got thrown off the boat because I tried to eat a seagull.

A lie you tell when you actually got lost in a parking lot.

I went to the ocean once. I got lost in a parking lot and called my mom.

I went to the ocean once. I got lost in a parking lot and cried like a baby.

I went to the ocean once. I got lost in a parking lot and got stuck behind a truck.

A story you tell to cover up the fact that you cried when you saw a crab.

I went to the ocean once. I cried when I saw a crab and ran away like a scared kid.

I went to the ocean once. I saw a crab and cried so hard my face turned red.

I went to the ocean once. I saw a crab and cried so much I got a tissue from my dad.