I plead the Santos

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3 views · Added 11d ago · 6 definitions

You get a free pass from getting in trouble because you can tell huge lies that make your brain hurt

I plead the Santos because I didn't eat the last slice of pizza, I just turned it into a ghost pizza

I plead the Santos because I didn't cheat, I just borrowed the answers from a guy who was already cheating

I plead the Santos because I didn't steal the lunch money, I just asked it nicely

You get to dodge blame because you lie so much it’s like you have a second mouth

I plead the Santos because I didn’t break the lamp, I just gave it a high five

I plead the Santos because I didn’t spill the juice, I just made it do a backflip

I plead the Santos because I didn’t eat the whole cake, I just said it was a cake emergency

You can get away with anything because you’re a certified master of fake stories

I plead the Santos because I didn’t punch the wall, I just gave it a friendly reminder

I plead the Santos because I didn’t copy the test, I just borrowed it for a little while

I plead the Santos because I didn’t steal the cookies, I just took a cookie loan

You can escape punishment because you tell such big lies it’s like you’re a magician of nonsense

I plead the Santos because I didn’t throw the eraser, I just gave it a job interview

I plead the Santos because I didn’t run away, I just went on a secret mission

I plead the Santos because I didn’t eat the homework, I just gave it a snack

You can avoid getting in trouble because you lie so much, it's like you're a trained liar with a PhD in bullsh*t

I plead the Santos because I didn’t break the phone, I just gave it a karate chop

I plead the Santos because I didn’t eat the dog’s food, I just took a food tour

I plead the Santos because I didn’t throw the teacher’s coffee, I just gave it a little push

You can get out of trouble because you can make up stories so fast, it’s like you have a lie factory in your brain

I plead the Santos because I didn’t steal the pencil, I just took a pencil loan

I plead the Santos because I didn’t kick the door, I just gave it a little tap

I plead the Santos because I didn’t eat the teacher’s sandwich, I just gave it a snack break