I know Jesus loves YOU!

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3 views · Added 11d ago · 3 definitions

A person telling you that Jesus gave you a free pass after you did something stupid and came out of it with only a few broken bones and a lot of pride.

I know Jesus loves YOU! You just dodged a bullet and still managed to trip over a flaming sword.

I know Jesus loves YOU! You got hit by a truck and came out with only a few bruises and a lot of sass.

I know Jesus loves YOU! You fought a dragon, lost a few teeth, and still had the energy to laugh at it.

by Slangipedia 11d ago

Someone saying God's got a soft spot for you because you barely survived something that should have killed you and probably still had time to flirt with death.

I know Jesus loves YOU! You were buried alive and still managed to text me with one hand.

I know Jesus loves YOU! You got thrown into a volcano and came out with a sunburn and a new hobby.

I know Jesus loves YOU! You were trapped in a microwave and somehow still had the energy to complain about the heat.

by Slangipedia 11d ago

A person giving you a shoutout from the heavens because you managed to walk away from a situation that should have ended your life, and you probably laughed about it.

I know Jesus loves YOU! You got hit by a meteor and still had the guts to ask for a second date.

I know Jesus loves YOU! You were stuck in a blender for 20 minutes and came out with a smile and a hair cut.

I know Jesus loves YOU! You got thrown into a shark tank and came out with only a few bites and a new confidence.

by Slangipedia 11d ago