I call Retard
I call Retard is when your dumb friend acts like the f***ing retard at the club while you sit there like a f***ing idiot. You get laid, but you might end up f***ed up on oxy and weed in a corner.
I let my friend Jake call Retard and I had to eat pizza while he got high and flirted with the waitress.
My friend Maya called Retard and I had to listen to her f***ing stupid jokes all night.
I let my friend Evan call Retard and I had to sit through his f***ing dumb speeches.