I am unintelligent

My math test was 100% wrong. I thought 2+2 was 5. My brain’s broken.

I tried to explain gravity to my dog. He just stared at me like I was a bad muffin.

I asked my teacher if I could take the test home. She said no. I said, ‘But I don’t know where my house is.’

I said ‘I’m going to the store.’ My mom said, ‘You’re already at the store.’

I tried to cook. The fire went out. I think I burned the house down.

I asked my friend for help. He said, ‘You’re the dumbest person I know.’ I said, ‘You’re welcome.’

I tried to send a text. I just drew a picture of a cat. My friend thought I was mad.

I asked my teacher what ‘text’ meant. She said, ‘It means you write on your phone.’ I said, ‘Oh, I thought it was a new type of math.’

I told my mom I was going to text her. She said, ‘You can just talk to me.’ I said, ‘But I don’t want to.’