Haisel
Haisel is the guy who thinks he's your best friend but acts like he's your mom. He'll cry when you're sad, and he'll punch you if you're not happy.
I cried for an hour because you weren't happy! Now punch me or I'll cry more!
You're my best friend, but you're also like my mom. I can't stand it!
I cried so hard I had to punch you for not smiling back.