hairy turtle - A guy with a patch of baldness in his pubic area, like a tur

A guy with a patch of baldness in his pubic area, like a turtle with no shell. It’s the ultimate insult for a man who can’t grow a decent bush.

My cousin’s a hairy turtle. He tried to shave and now he looks like a lobster with no legs.

My dad’s a hairy turtle. He’s got a bald spot the size of a dinner plate.

I called my brother a hairy turtle after he tried to do a Brazilian and failed.