Hair of the monkey
A smelly, twisted hair clump that happens when you wipe your ass with your hair and call it a style.
I tried to make a cool hairdo in the bathroom. Now my hair looks like a raccoon’s butt. Hair of the monkey.
My sister used her hair to wipe and now it's stuck together. Hair of the monkey, I tell you.
My dad thinks he’s a rockstar. His hair is the Hair of the Monkey. It’s gross.