Hair metal hoochie mama

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A mom with a big head who still screams along to 80s rock and thinks she was the best groupie ever.

'I used to know the lead singer of Mötley Crüe. He used to call me his personal hot dog.'

She shows up to the grocery store in a leather jacket and a perm that could knock someone out.

Her DMs are just her yelling at the radio and crying about her ex.

A woman with a head full of hairspray who still thinks she's a rock star and acts like everyone else is a total poser.

'I had a tour bus. It got stolen by a guy who didn't know how to drive.'

She tries to sing at karaoke and everyone stares at her like she's from another planet.

She sends a text: 'I still have my glitter shoes. You don't.'

A mom with a hairdo so big it could be a new planet and still acts like she's part of a real band.

She shows up to the school play with a mullet and a necklace that has a bell on it.

She texts her kids: 'I was in a band. You were in a play. I was cooler.'

She tries to start a cover band with her dog and a boombox.