Hag reflex

When you see an old lady who smells like a damp sock and looks like she just fought a war with a toaster. It hits you like a punch to the gut and a sneeze at the same time.

A bodily reaction you get when you see a woman who looks like she’s been sitting in a sauna and a trash can for 30 years.

The moment you see a woman who looks like she’s been chewed by a dog and then left outside in the rain for a week. It makes you want to run, hide, or start a new life.

A reaction you get when you see a woman who looks like she’s been sitting in a hot tub full of mold and regret. It hits you like a surprise birthday party you didn’t want.

When you see a woman who smells like old socks, cheese, and despair. It makes you want to run away, or maybe just lay down and die.

A reaction that hits you when you see a woman who looks like she’s been through a blender and then left out in the sun for a year. It’s like getting a bad grade and then being yelled at by your teacher.