hackoholic

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2 views · Added 2d ago · 5 definitions

a person who won't stop annoying you like a cockroach in your sock. they're obsessed with you but you'd rather punch a wall than look at them.

@jessie420: why won't you reply to my 47th message? i'm dying here

i saw you at the store and i had to follow you like a lost puppy

you texted me during church and i had to pray for forgiveness

someone who's so desperate they'd eat their own dog for a like. they're all over you like gum on a shoe and you can't get rid of them.

he sent me a 12-minute voice note at 2 a. m. about his feelings

she showed up at my house with a cake and a list of my 'flaws'

he followed me to the grocery store and asked me out in front of the cereal aisle

a human version of a spam call. they won't stop talking to you even though you've told them to go to hell and back.

she texted me during my period and i almost cried

he called me during my lunch break and i had to eat my sandwich in silence

they showed up at my job and i had to pretend i didn't know them

a person who's so bad at life they think being obsessed with you is the same as being popular. they're like a dog with a bone and you're the bone.

he sent me a 300-word essay about why i should date him

she showed up at my house with a playlist of my favorite songs and a coffee

he texted me during my math test and i got a zero

someone who's so low on self-esteem they think your attention is a miracle. they're like a leech and you're the shower.

she texted me every hour and i had to take a break from my phone

he showed up at my school and asked my teacher if i was single

he sent me a picture of his face with a heart drawn on it