haanie

Fresh
#best friend#morning boost#god tier

0 views · Added 2d ago · 6 definitions

1
a friend so good she makes your day feel like a vacation and your heart feel like it's been massaged by a god. you’re a damn lucky son of a bitch if you got her.
You text her at 2 a. m. and she texts back instantly. You’re like, ‘Why are you awake?’ She says, ‘Why are you not?’
She walks in the room and suddenly the sun is shining again. You’re like, ‘What is this magic?’
She brings you coffee and a compliment. You’re like, ‘Is this a trap?’
by Slangipedia 2d ago
2
looks nice at first, but once you know her, she’s a tiny monster who wants to live forever and probably hates your guts.
You start talking to her, and she says, ‘I’m going to live until I’m 205.’ You’re like, ‘What even is this?’
She smiles at you, then says, ‘I’m going to outlive you.’ You’re like, ‘What’s wrong with you?’
She acts like your friend, then you find out she’s been plotting your demise since third grade.
by Slangipedia 2d ago
3
the hottest guy ever, but also the sweetest. he’s like a god in a body, and he speaks arabic like it’s a secret language.
He walks in the room and everyone stops talking. You’re like, ‘What the hell is this?’
He says something in arabic, and you’re like, ‘What was that?’ He says, ‘I just said you’re ugly.’ You’re like, ‘I’m not.’
He smiles at you, and you’re like, ‘I might die.’
by Slangipedia 2d ago
4
the most selfish, ugly, rat-like nightmare ever. she’s a fat, smelly, rat-faced, breath-smelling, Indian-claiming, African-lying, slinkiest, embarrassment-filled human being.
She walks in the room, and you’re like, ‘What is that smell?’ She says, ‘I just ate a rat.’ You’re like, ‘Why would you do that?’
She claims to be from Africa, but you’re like, ‘You look like you were born in a trash can.’
She breathes on you, and you’re like, ‘I might need to go to the hospital.’
by Slangipedia 2d ago
5
a Chad. basically a human version of a superhero. he’s like a god with a body and a smile.
He walks in, and everyone’s like, ‘Who is that?’ You’re like, ‘That’s a Chad.’
He smiles at you, and you’re like, ‘I’m going to die.’
He says, ‘I’m a Chad.’ You’re like, ‘What even is that?’
by Slangipedia 2d ago
6
the happiest, kindest, most caring guy ever. he’s like a human heart with a face and a smile.
He walks in, and you’re like, ‘Why are you so happy?’ He says, ‘Because I’m a human heart.’
He gives you a hug, and you’re like, ‘I might cry.’
He says, ‘I’m a very good friend.’ You’re like, ‘You’re also a very good human.’
by Slangipedia 2d ago
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