Galloping Gasmalacker
When your guts feel like they’ve been kicked by a goat and your breath smells like a dead fish in a swamp.
I couldn’t go to work because my boss said I smelled like a fart in a sock drawer.
My sister threw a pillow at me. She said I was the worst person ever.
I had to eat my dinner in the garden. I didn’t want to scare the birds.