galk galk 3000

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what your ex-wife could give you back in the 90s but no one had a name for it yet

'I’ll take the dog and the credit card debt. You keep the embarrassment.'

'You’re not getting my shoes back. You’re getting my shoes and my hate.'

'You can have the house. I’ll take the divorce papers and your sanity.'

the 90s version of a text message fight but with more screaming and less emoji

'I’ll leave you in the middle of the mall. You’ll be surrounded by fidget spinners and regret.'

'You think you’re funny? Wait till I tell your mom about the cheeseburger incident.'

'You can’t even handle my passive-aggressive Facebook posts. What are you going to do?'

when your ex-wife gives you back what you had but with a side of sarcasm and a full-blown temper tantrum

'You get the house. I get the cat. And you get my hate for your life choices.'

'Back at you, pal. I got your mess and your old gym membership.'

'You can take the car. I’ll take the reminder that you once tried to live in a van.'