Gaffet
A smelly old man who thinks he's still cool, spends all day online arguing with kids who are barely out of middle school. He's a racist, loud mouth, and the reason why your uncle still thinks 2004 was the best year ever.
'You think you're better than me? I was on the internet before you were born!', Gaffet at 4:30 AM.
'Why is this kid even talking to me? I'm the king of the internet!', Gaffet's last words before a 12-year-old called him a 'fart in a suit.'
Gaffet's DM: 'You're not even real. I bet you're just a robot.', From a 48-year-old who still uses 'lol' as a verb.